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That Dorky Homemade Look: Quilting Lessons From a Parallel Universe [Paperback]

Our Price $ 8.46  
Retail Value $ 9.95  
You Save $ 1.49  (15%)  
Item Number 121109  
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Item Specifications...

Pages   144
Est. Packaging Dimensions:   Length: 8.43" Width: 5.5" Height: 0.38"
Weight:   0.35 lbs.
Binding  Softcover
Release Date   May 1, 2002
Publisher   Good Books
ISBN  1561483516  
EAN  9781561483518  


Availability  3 units.
Availability accurate as of May 22, 2017 07:47.
Usually ships within one to two business days from La Vergne, TN.
Orders shipping to an address other than a confirmed Credit Card / Paypal Billing address may incur and additional processing delay.


Item Description...
Overview
Fed up with feeling like you can't meet the standards of the Quilt Police? Do you want to quilt for comfort and pleasure -- and not to win some high-falutin' quilting contest? Weary of worrying about what others will think of your color choices -- or your pieced points? Or your applique stitches? That Dorky Homemade Look: Quilting Lessons from a Parallel Universe is the quilting companion you've been wishing for. Lisa Boyer, a popular columnist for Quilting Today magazine, gives you permission to quilt because you love it. She clears your path of all those merciless judgments pronounced by the Quilting Queens. She invites you to make quilts that are full of life. This funny book offers these nine principles for the 20 million quilters in America: 1. Pretty fabric is not acceptable. Go right back to the quilt shop and exchange it for something you feel sorry for. 2. Realize that patterns and templates are only someone's opinion and should be loosely translated. Personally, I've never thought much of a person who could only make a triangle with three sides. 3. When choosing a color plan for your quilt, keep in mind that the colors will fade after a hundred years or so. This being the case, you will need to start with really bright colors. 4. You should plan on cutting off about half your triangle or star points. Any more than that is showing off. 5. If you are doing applique, remember that bigger is dorkier. Flowers should be huge. Animals should possess really big eyes. 6. Throw away your seam ripper and repeat after me: "Oops. Oh, no one will notice." 7. Plan on running out of border fabric when you are three-quarters of the way finished. Complete the remaining border with something else you have a lot of, preferably in an unrelated color family. 8. You should be able to quilt equally well in all directions. I had to really work on this one. It was difficult to make my forward stitching look as bad as my backward stitching, but closing my eyes helped. 9. When you have put your last stitch in the binding, you are still only half finished. Your quilt must now undergo a thorough conditioning. Give it to someone you love dearly-to drag around the house, wrap up in, spill something on, and wash and dry until it is properly lumpy. No reason not to have quiltmaking be a pleasure, says Lisa Boyer, who has as firm of a grip on her sense of humor as she does on her quilting needles.

Publishers Description

"Quilt humorist" Lisa Boyer gives you permission to quilt even if you make mistakes. Her humorous essays are full of her own mistakes and mishaps as she perfects her quilting technique.
Fed up with feeling like you can't meet the standards of the Quilt Police? Do you want to quilt for comfort and pleasure -- and not to win some high-falutin' quilting contest? Weary of worrying about what others will think of your color choices -- or your pieced points? Or your applique stitches? That Dorky Homemade Look: Quilting Lessons from a Parallel Universe is the quilting companion you've been wishing for.
Lisa Boyer, a popular columnist for Quilting Today magazine, gives you permission to quilt because you love it. She clears your path of all those merciless judgments pronounced by the Quilting Queens. She invites you to make quilts that are full of life. This funny book offers these nine principles for the 20 million quilters in America:
1. Pretty fabric is not acceptable. Go right back to the quilt shop and exchange it for something you feel sorry for.
2. Realize that patterns and templates are only someone's opinion and should be loosely translated. Personally, I've never thought much of a person who could only make a triangle with three sides.
3. When choosing a color plan for your quilt, keep in mind that the colors will fade after a hundred years or so. This being the case, you will need to start with really bright colors.
4. You should plan on cutting off about half your triangle or star points. Any more than that is showing off.
5. If you are doing applique, remember that bigger is dorkier. Flowers should be huge. Animals should possess really big eyes.
6. Throw away your seam ripper and repeat after me: "Oops. Oh, no one will notice."
7. Plan on running out of border fabric when you are three-quarters of the way finished. Complete the remaining border with something else you have a lot of, preferably in an unrelated color family.
8. You should be able to quilt equally well in all directions. I had to really work on this one. It was difficult to make my forward stitching look as bad as my backward stitching, but closing my eyes helped.
9. When you have put your last stitch in the binding, you are still only half finished. Your quilt must now undergo a thorough conditioning. Give it to someone you love dearly--to drag around the house, wrap up in, spill something on, and wash and dry until it is properly lumpy.
"No reason not to have quiltmaking be a pleasure," says Lisa Boyer, who has as firm a grip on her sense of humor as she does on her quilting needles. "If we didn't make Dorky Homemade quilts, all the quilts in the world would end up in the Beautiful Quilt Museum, untouched and intact. Quilts would just be something to look at. We would forget that quilts are lovable, touchable, shreddable, squeezable, chewable, and huggable -- made to wrap up in when the world seems to be falling down around us."

Buy That Dorky Homemade Look: Quilting Lessons From a Parallel Universe by Lisa Boyer, D. S. Clark, Sanford D. Eigenbrode, J. D. Wulfhorst, Peter Hogan, Lubos Merhaut & Marta Ottlova from our Christian Books store - isbn: 9781561483518 & 1561483516

The team at Christian Bookstore .Net welcome you to our Christian Book store! We offer the best selections of Christian Books, Bibles, Christian Music, Inspirational Jewelry and Clothing, Homeschool curriculum, and Church Supplies. We encourage you to purchase your copy of That Dorky Homemade Look: Quilting Lessons From a Parallel Universe by Lisa Boyer, D. S. Clark, Sanford D. Eigenbrode, J. D. Wulfhorst, Peter Hogan, Lubos Merhaut & Marta Ottlova today - and if you are for any reason not happy, you have 30 days to return it. Please contact us at 1-877-205-6402 if you have any questions.

More About Lisa Boyer, D. S. Clark, Sanford D. Eigenbrode, J. D. Wulfhorst, Peter Hogan, Lubos Merhaut & Marta Ottlova

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Lisa Boyer became a self-taught quilter at the age of eight, patching together a salesman's book of bedspread swatches with her toy sewing machine. She only took a few years off as she earned her degree in microbiology, worked as a clinical laboratory scientist, then became a sewing-machine mechanic, pattern designer, quilt teacher, writer, magazine columnist, and mother. Her varied interests have led her to write articles on such diverse topics as quilting, hurricanes, vegetables, shoes, and sewing-machine repair, just to name a few. Known to her friends as "the mad quilt scientist," Lisa combines her love of quilting with her background in science and psychology, resulting in some strangely unique philosophies. Her first book, That Dorky Homemade Look--Quilting Lessons from a Parallel Universe, was written as a tribute to all the lovely, but less-than-perfect, quilts and quilters everywhere. Lisa's articles have appeared in Kauai Magazine and the Orange County Register, in addition to her regular column in Quiltworks Today Magazine. Lisa's quilts have appeared in Quilting Today, Quiltworks Today, Miniature Quilts and Kauai magazines. She also made a guest appearance on HGTV's "Simply Quilts." Lisa Boyer is a native of southern California. She now lives in Hawaii on the island of Kauai with her husband, a clockmaker by avocation, and their son.

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Product Categories
1Books > Subjects > Home & Garden > Crafts & Hobbies > General   [8156  similar products]
2Books > Subjects > Home & Garden > Crafts & Hobbies > Quilts & Quilting   [1096  similar products]



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Reviews - What do our customers think?
An Essential Read for Every Quilter  Nov 13, 2008
If you love to quilt and need to stop taking your craft too seriously, this book is for you! No matter what your skill level, you'll find yourself in these humorous antidotes. Lisa is so funny, I wish she was in my quilt group.
 
plaqueslayer  Mar 25, 2007
Funny funny funny! And you learn alittle too while reading it. Any one who quilts can relate to this book.
 
Quilters will relate  Jan 12, 2007
Lisa Boyer has a great sense of humor and she writes about her philosphy of quilting. As a fellow quilter, I could relate to everything she says. When you need a break I recommend you make yourself a cup of tea and enjoy her humorous banter. It will definitely make you feel better about those quilting mistakes that bug us from time to time. I chuckled thoughout the entire book.
 
That Dorky Homemade Look: Quilting Lessons from a Parallel Universe  Jan 9, 2007
I laughed and loved this book. It was given to me as a birthday
present from one of my quilting buddies. This book is the one that encouraged me to buy her second book [that I know about] for my quilting buddies. FUN reading.
 
Wonderfully Witty!  Jul 26, 2004
Her quilting perceptions are truly wonderful. I really loved how she described the muck in her sewing room that htreatened to engulf her in the midst of a big decision. This is how i feel with every quilt! A great light read. I would recommend it for anyone who is threatening to take themselves too seriously!
 

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